Other Ten Percent 4/29/14

Apr 29 2014

Hello there friends, I had maybe the most bizarre anxiety dream ever last night where I somehow got hired as a writer on The Simpsons and my first episode had such dismal ratings they just decided to go ahead and cancel the Simpsons and I realized I would go down in history as the dude that wrote the episode that took down a television institution. Pretty sure the dream was inspired by this news story. Of course the Simpsons still has a good number of years left in it considering those ratings mean it beat CBS in that time slot (and of course that’s like one of 6 ridiculously unlikely parts of that dream) but it was still apparently really uncomfortable for my subconscious to realize that someday The Simpsons too shall pass
But enough about yesterday’s entertainment news, let’s talk instead about today’s big entertainment news story: Emma Stone lip-syncing to All I Do is Win. Can all of us make a pact that SOMEBODY around here needs to get famous enough to invite Emma Stone to a party and have her actually show up? I mean I’m still not going to watch the new Spider-Man movie because I didn’t like the first one that much and I have this new policy where when I like a character but DON’T like the movie franchise’s direction I don’t give that franchise money to go watch the new movie and continue to be angry about it. Clearly this clip from the Tonight Show is the best possible entertainment news to discuss that idea.
Wait, what else happened? Seriously, I’m not sure when between Episode III and Lucas selling to Disney I ran out of fucks to give about Star Wars but every time there’s a new announcement I click on it and I’m surprised to find I still just do not care at all. Then like three weeks later there’s some new bit of Star Wars news and it’s like I FORGOT that I never find it interesting and I’m surprised anew by my lack of any reaction. I’m not even angry or think the movie’s going to be bad because “J.J. Abrams is a hack!” or some shit like that I just have nothing to say except my endless capacity for meta-commentary on my own lack of reaction.
Anyway I’m keeping this one fairly short both because my Simpsons Anxiety Dream Journal didn’t turn out to be fodder for as much material as I thought and because I think I’ve got some other writing I should/could be doing right now so I’m going to go and do it.

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